Thursday, 04 June 2009

  • Our plans VS God's plans

    I spoke to one friend of mine the other day. We talked about God, and I asked why he didn't believe in Jesus. He told me that everything in his life is so good at the moment.


    I understood from what he said that     he probably either thought he didn't need God, or then he thought God would spoil everything and make his life worse. Or maybe not worse, but just radically change it into a more undesirable direction.

    At the moment I was puzzled. Why would anyone reject God?
    God doesn't make our life miserable. He loves us and saves us and teaches us new things; He answers all our questions and is with us every day of our life; He chills with us, laughs and crys with us..

    Why would someone be afraid of God making things worse?

    I didn't understand it then. But then I ended up listening to Heidi Baker from the internet.
    As I listened to her message I was amazed at her. She was so pure in her love for God. So obedient, so lovable, faithful, thirsty for Jesus. I realized that I wanted what she had.

    I want to know God as she knows Him. I want to thirst for Jesus; I want more of God. I want to know what He is thinking; I want to share everything with Him. I want to say: "Yes Lord, take me wherever you want, my life is yours, I want to obey You, I want to love like You do. Just teach me everything and do with my life whatever You see fit."

    This is what my heart cried out from the depths of my spirit. But then something came up. I recalled Heidi telling how people have been trying to kill her and all other hardships that she has been through. No one said following Jesus was easy. I hesitated; do I really want all that I said above? Do I really want to get to know more of Jesus' heart and follow Him wherever He may lead me, if I had to let go of some things?

    Then I understood my friend’s thoughts: he doesn't know what God would do with his life if he gave it to Him. Maybe God would make him do some things he doesn't feel comfortable doing, maybe he would need to give up things...

    But the thing is, I know what my friend would get in return, and I know it is worth it. Not only worth it in this life, but also in the other. Because I have crossed that line of belief I know his fears are vain. He has no reason to be afraid of God. Accepting Jesus as the only Son of God and our Saviour is the greatest thing that can happen to us and the best thing ever.

    This moment of hesitation I had, passed as I made my decision. If I have not lived in that kind of obedience, that kind of intimacy with God, why should I be afraid of it?     Just because I can imagine all sorts of things that could frighten me with such a commitment does not mean I am right and that my life would turn miserable. Sure bad things happen, but bad things happen to everyone. I see the fruits such commitment to God bears and I long for it, what should I be frightened of?

    Because I know God created me and I know I am going to heaven because of Jesus, wouldn't I want to make the most of my life? Wouldn't I want to live for God fully, to love with all I have (or with what God gives me) and search God the most? I do. That is exactly what I want. I want Jesus fully. Not just the part where He dies for my sins and opens the gate for me to enter heaven, but I want to get to know His heart. What is He thinking at the moment? What could Jesus do through me, if I let Him? Nothing is impossible for him, who believes, because I myself cannot do anything, but God in me is able to do everything, I believe He can change my resisting heart into something that can please Him.

    I want Jesus.


    Jesus I ask you to use me. Jesus give me love to love people like you love them. Teach me obedience, teach me grace, and teach me love. Give me wisdom, humility, understanding, patience, love. In Jesus name.

    God is truly alive. He is amazing. Nothing binds Him. He is great. My words are not able to describe God, but I know He loves us with His everlasting love and I know His heart longs for ours. I know He is patient so that we could get to know Him better and we could be saved. Thank you Jesus!





    Eeva//Thirsting for God Jesus!

    I want to drink from the spring of eternal life!

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